START LISTENING TO HIM AND INSTEAD OF JUST ASKING HIM…
Got a slap in the face today. Heard someone say that they are looking to remove me and marielle as leaders. My initial reaction was of course shock and anger. But I subsided. I do not blame them. We have been preoccupied. I had to handle my business first. My uber-anxiety was revived due to the stupid movie that is Paranormal Activity, but I have been able to overcome thanks to my Spiritual Guides, Sister Mary and Father Marvin. And on to the fact that i am struggling in school right now and there was an epic family incident that just happened. So my October was full of trials, tests,and failures. I couldn’t focus on Bayside because I couldn’t commit myself mentally and most importantly physically. I never faced such an epic test of faith and spiritual warfare before. It was the biggest struggle of my love for God ever. But I overcame. Granted that sprititual battle is still ongoing, but one things for sure, I am even more prepared to handle it and fight it.
God is waking me up. After reading Phillip’s tumblog, I feel that it is true. I am so wrapped up on my own world, my own desires, my own faith. God shows Himself to us in different ways. We all have different ways to interpret His faith and love but at the end of the day, its all just 1FAITH AND 1LOVE. And I need to start looking out for my fellow brothers and sisters. I know God has got my back. I know that I am one of His many sheep that will not be harmed. But does the rest of the world know that? Let alone trust in that? Don’t think so. I have been re-awakened, re-focused to bring God back into this world.
To my fellow baysiders. Straight up, I’ve been a crap leader. I haven’t been there for any of you. I failed to be a provider, a pastor, and a protector. I failed to keep you guys active in this ministry. I failed to bring a better understanding of God’s love. I failed to bring you the glory that is the Rosary and Holy Mass (because let’s face it, 90% of you do not like doing them). I am a failure. I am a dissappointment. But at the end of the day I am still God’s child, I am still His humbled servant and follower. And I am still a brother who will always pray for you and ask nothing but the best for you. May you forgive me for my lack of leadership. and may God bless all of you and your families. I love you guys. I haven’t showed it to the fullest of my capabilities but I love you all.
Praise God for what he has done to me. I will be stronger, more faithful, more responsible.
Pray. Put in work. You WILL recieve GREATNESS. God provides. Amen.
Amen. God has amazing plans for you Bro. I love you. And I will always be praying for you, my leader. =)
